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Saturday - March 09, 2002
A Banner Day


Web design. Let's talk about THAT, shall we?

The more I work on this site, the more I realize I don't know dick about working on this website. See those buttons over on the left? Well, my bright idea was to create three sets of rotating banners. There would be three spots and each of those buttons would flash every 30 seconds or so, and poof - instant happiness. And wouldn't THAT just be nifty skippy?

Why, yes. It would.

Well, as you can see, that isn't going to fucking happen. Turns out the javascript can't handle more than one rotating script at a time. So, you might have seen Smut Gremlin, but the link went to Porno4Women. And, while I do see the fun in that system, I don`t think anyone else appreciated it. It's 2 days later. I honestly can't mess with it anymore. My apologies for the menu column from hell. I'm working on it. Or, rather, I will be working on it as soon as I stop resenting it.

This is why I get paid to talk about fucking. I KNOW how to do that.

Speaking of things I know, there is a new section on the site. Special Features. This includes a small essay called Birth of a Phone Sex Slut that gives you a little insight as to how I developed my phone sex fetish. It might surprise you. Also, you'll find my Muppet Sex Report. Hopefully both are worth a few grins and giggles.

I'm off to go piss on a copy of the Front Page instruction booklet. I know it doesn't help, but it makes me feel better.

Besides. Wanna bet me that I can get a john to pay for it when I'm done?




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